How to Put Up with Difficult Parents and Annoying Siblings!

NO! STOP! ALRIGHT, I GET IT!  We say these words a lot especially to the people we love the most, like siblings and parents. Life isn’t always easy, especially with siblings. They’re annoying you, laughing at you, calling you names.  But here's the deal, you need to shrug it off, or try something like making it into a joke instead. Parents on the other hand are a whole different story. They’re always telling you to go to bed, turn off the TV, don’t talk back, etc...  But, think about it, they are usually just trying to do what’s best for you.  They are making sure you are healthy and well, that you aren't spending so much time with electronic devices, and help you grow up to be a healthy adult.  What you have to do is make the best of things.

You can't change your parents and your can't change your siblings.  What choice do you have but to make the best of things?  But, how do you do that?  First off, change your thinking.  Fighting, arguing, saying negative comments only creates more problems.  No one wins, everyone is miserable.  Sometimes it seems like one sibling gets his/her way, but in the long wrong, everyone is angry or irritated or mad.  Changing your thinking begins the process of changing your behavior which changes, slowly, but surely, the relationships you have with others.

Ok, so you've decided to make a change in your thinking.  You are not going to try to win every argument, you are not going to irritate your siblings just for the sake of irritating them, you are not going to gripe at your parents every time they ask you to do something, just as examples.  But it seems every time you try to follow your new plans, you wind up angry and/or hurt and then back in the same old arguments and name calling.  Why?  Unfortunately, the brain makes it hard to change very emotional relationships.  The anger, the irritation, the hurt are stronger than your new thinking.  The brain is set up this way on purpose, but it can be changed!

How?  You have to rewire your brain, train it.  You do this by every day taking time to create calm, relaxing, happy thoughts.  This is like charging a battery or cell phone.  We have to plug in on a regular basis, not once we've run out power, or the device will keep quitting on us.  Every time you hook yourself up to positive, calm thoughts and feelings, they are able to keep going throughout the day more and more.  The more you plug in, the stronger they get.  Then, when you are faced with a challenge, you are more able to remember you want to keep thinking - "I am not going to fight back."  Or, " I can ignore this."  Or, "I can laugh this off."

Find time to sit alone in your room or at a library and just be calm.  Take a yoga class.  Put calm, relaxing music with no words on your iPod and listen while doodling.  Go for a walk.  Lie in bed and just listen to the sound of your breathing.  Then, begin to create the new, happier relationships you want in life!

 

Tammy and Carmen

We'd love to hear your ideas!

Begin a New School Year with Confidence!

With the new school year starting all you want to do is look good, dress well, and give everyone the right impression. But you also want to make some goals, yoga can help.  When you're worried about looking good it can be stressful, you're always looking for the new best perfume, blush to match your skin tone, but in the end is it really worth it?  Sometimes looking good isn't always on the outside, but on the inside too. Dressing well is a big deal these days, everyone always wants the new fashion, but before you know it time has changed and so has fashion. But think about it, you need to be confident no matter what you wear! And finally, giving the right impression is not a popularity contest, or about who's best looking. A true good impression is filled with confidence, respect, and most of all being yourself.

How can yoga help?  Yoga isn't just about the poses (called Asanas), it's also about intentions, awareness, breathing, and trust.  When we practice regularly, we can feel good about ourselves and how we look, no matter what.  Poses to try for confidence:  Warrior poses create confidence, strength, and focus - this is who I am and who I want to be, and I am focused on my goals -now that's a good impression!  Warrior I, Warrior II, and Warrior III. 

Setting intentions is something to do before you practice, before you start the day, or every time you look in the mirror.  For example, "I will believe in myself today."  "I can do whatever I set my mind toward."  Set and keep the intention throughout a task, a class, your yoga practice, or for a whole day or week.

When you practice yoga it teaches awareness of your body and your mind.  It teaches you to pay attention to what you are thinking and what you are doing physically.  This way, you will know when you are standing confidently, showing pride in who you are, standing with strength.  It also will teach you to stop negative thinking.  Awareness can keep you from allowing negative thinking patterns to take over.  Be aware of your thoughts and keep them positive, so you learn to feel good about yourself! 

When anxiety and stress take over, the breath can turn it down.  Learning to use your breath to relax and calm is the easiest and best way for the mind to begin to control the body.  Start by breathing into the belly as if filling it up like a balloon.  Do this 4 times, exhaling long and slow.  There are many very effective breathing techniques yoga can teach.

A regular yoga practice teaches you to trust- trust the body to do what you want, trust the mind to be in your control and trust spirit to help you to feel joy!  Yoga is a focused and intentional practice and when you take time to do it, you learn about yourself and soon trust yourself in so many ways!